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If you’ve ever had a wife or girlfriend it didn’t take long to realize the depreciating nature of relationships. Most relationships, even the best ones, go through the aging process where both people inevitably sense that spark begin to fade. It’s human nature. We’re attracted to novelty and excitement. There’s nothing as novel and exciting as a new partner. But once the two of you get to know each other in and out and become comfortable around each other, the novelty begins to fade. Before long, you’ll notice that the relationship might not be as exciting as it used to be. The notion of seeing the other person used to excite you but now It just seems like part of the daily routine. It’s unfortunate that relationships go this way. There probably isn’t any way to guarantee that this won’t happen. There are however some things you can do to keep the spark alive and burning as much as possible for as long as possible. Maintain Space I believe the most important thing you can do in a relationship in order to keep that magic spark going is to go through periods of separation from your partner. I don’t mean the separate and see other people type of separation, I mean building a relationship in which each person is afforded a considerable amount of personal space. This means that taking weekend trips with your friends and leaving your girl behind, having guys night out and even having nights where you both agree to do your own thing and not even contact the other person until the next day are all natural and healthy ways to keep mutual adoration and respect alive in a relationship. A relationship in which both parties smother each other and never spend time apart is doomed to fail. It is simply inevitable that you will grow sick of each other and when you do, it will be much uglier and irreparable when you’re not used to spending time apart. Maintain plenty of personal space and never let your relationship become your dominant personal identifier. Bust Balls I have a friend who is excellent at dating women for years and years and keeping them wanting him as much in year three as they did in month three. I’ve observed him and the way he does it is by relentlessly busting their balls. He teases them constantly and never gives them his approval (except in serious, meaningful situations of course). Women eat it up. When you turn into a Wuss Man who is constantly asking her if she’s okay and keeping your pulse on her feelings and empathizing with every little feminine emotional swing, your relationship is bound to fail. I truly believe that most of the emotional bullshit women do is a way of testing men. They don’t want a man who kisses their ass and coddles them each and every time something isn’t going their way. They want a guy who withholds his affection and approval for only rare (and therefore much more meaningful) occasions. Learn to laugh in your relationship. Be a cocky, sarcastic boyfriend. Give your girl a little playful push when you’re walking down the sidewalk or tell her how rude she is for never opening the car door for you. Get it? Women find this type of personality irresistible. Of course, know your limits. You can’t always behave this way. Mix it up. Be unpredictable. Keep her coming back for more. Be the sweet, gentle person who holds the door and compliments her outfit one minute and the next minute tell her she’s really blowing her chances with you by not showing more cleavage when you go out. Get it? The point is be sweet and funny but also sarcastic and unpredictable. Make Fun of the Relationship You Don’t Want A good way to keep your girl on the same page as you without having to do it via deep serious talks is to make fun of other couples who do things in their relationship that you don’t want to do in yours. For example, make fun of wussy guys who are constantly showering their girl with lines like, “I love you baby!” or “are you okay schnookums?” This can also be used to keep your sex life as a priority. Talk about how you see those couples all the time that can barely stand each other and probably don’t even have sex every night. Of course, most couples probably don’t have sex every night, but by phrasing it that way, you’re indicating to her that you think sex every night is the way things should be. This will mobilize her to make sure she keeps sex a top priority if she wants to keep you. Or talk about a friend who gets really “clingy” and “suffocates” himself and his relationship by trying to spend every waking minute with his girl and how you think that’s just so “unhealthy”. Notice how I used three strongly negative words there? By doing so, you’re reinforcing in her mind that being together 24/7 is unhealthy and something you expect to avoid.
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